VIP-shit, this out of control, they said it!!! Well then!

Some BIG GAFFs.............

Question: If you could live forever, would you and why?

Answer: I would not live forever, because we should not live
forever, because if we were supposed to live
forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live
forever, which is why I would not live forever.

*Miss Alabama in the 1994 Miss Universe contest

Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part
of your life.

*Brooke Shields during an interview to become
spokesperson for a federal anti-smoking campaign

Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime
rates in the country.

*Mayor Marion Barry, Washington, DC

I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body.

*Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward

It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the
impurities in our air and water that are doing it.

*Former U.S. Vice-President Dan Quayle

The streets are safe in Philadelphia. It's only the people who
make them unsafe.

*Frank Rizzo, ex-police chief and mayor of Philadelphia

The president has kept all of the promises he intended to keep.

*Clinton aide George Stephanopolous speaking on "Larry King Live"

After finding no qualified candidates for the position of principal,
the school board is extremely pleased to announce the appointment
of David Stelle to the post.

*Philip Streifer, Superintendent of Schools, Barrington, Rhode Island

That lowdown scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death by a
jackass,and I'm just the one to do it.

*A congressional candidate in Texas

The police are not here to create disorder. They're here to

*Former Chicago mayor Daley during the infamous 1968 Democratic Party convention

China is a big country, inhabited by many Chinese.

*Former French President Charles de Gaulle

I haven't committed a crime. What I did was fail to comply
with the law.

*David Dinkins, New York City Mayor, answering
accusations that he failed to pay his taxes.

The Internet is a great way to get on the Net.

*Republican presidential candidate Bob Dole

Things are more like they are now than they ever were before.

*Former U.S. President Dwight D. Eisenhower

Traditionally, most of Australia's imports come from overseas.

*Former Australian cabinet minister Keppel Enderbery

We're going to turn this team around 360 degrees.

*Jason Kidd, upon his drafting to the Dallas Mavericks
(360 degrees means turning around and facing the same side again)

Half of this game is ninety percent mental.

*Philadelphia Phillies manager Danny Ozark

They're multipurpose. Not only do they put the clips on,
but they take them off.

*Pratt & Whitney spokesperson explaining why the company
charged the Air Force nearly $1,000 for an ordinary pair
of pliers

Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the
world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that
but not with all those flies and death and stuff.

*Mariah Carey Pop singer


© Eva-Maria Schubert-Laudenklos